Tuesday, 16 February 2010

17 working days...

Tuesday, 16 February 2010
And counting!

Yep, that really is all I have left at work, two full days this week and then three more weeks to the finishing line. I can't believe it has come round so quickly but, to be honest, I'm really feeling the tiredness now so I'm glad it has.

I've also got problems with a guy at work who has major issues with me because I'm pregnant. He has major issues full stop and has, over the last couple of years, upset, angered and generally pissed off every single person in our office with his attitude and behaviour. Granted, he has several personal issues but he treats people appallingly, ie he talks to people like they are a piece of crap, and then uses his problems as a get out clause for behaving that way.

I am not unsympathetic to his problems but he certainly isn't the only one with issues and none of the rest of us feel the need to bring ours into the work place. Certainly none of us use them as an excuse for our behaviour.

Anyway, one of his problems is that he and his wife cannot have kids of their own. They do have an adopted son but this guys whole attitude is that this isn't good enough and it's not the same as having his own. In itself I find this offensive as he truly behaves like his son doesn't count in the same way as a 'real' child would. I have friends and family who have adopted children and not one of them would dream of having this attitude, equally I have childless friends who have not managed to adopt who would kill to be in the position he is in.

So, to cut a long story a little bit short, this guy cannot cope with sitting in an office with me because I am pregnant. He sent me an email telling me this and stating that it was like 'being stabbed in the guts' when I was around. To be fair, I didn't need the email as he'd made it abundantly clear that he has a problem with me - he puts his headphones on when I walk in the room, he doesn't acknowledge me speaking, he lets doors slam in my face, that kind of thing - but to have it written down in that way was really upsetting.

Thankfully my boss thought so too and he has been ordered to attend counselling and is currently only working part time hours. His attacks on me are the end of a long line of official complaints but thankfully because he did this part of it in writing (most of his previous encounters with me and other staff have been verbal) it is easier for the boss to make this an official process.

DH is, as you can imagine, a little stressed out about me being here with him and some of the other staff are also concerned that he is unhinged enough to actually harm me. Obviously I try not to think about this too much and I honestly don't think it would come to him being a physical threat to me but it is extremely uncomfortable being around him. I work in a large open plan office though and there are 20 guys around all of whom would welcome the chance to throw themselves between me and him so hopefully the next three and a half weeks will pass without incident and then I don't have to worry about him for nine months.

Another not good thing is that DH's cousin died in his sleep on Friday night. He was only 30 and, as far as everyone knew, was fit and healthy. The autopsy showed it was a massive stroke which, if one can take comfort from things, is a good thing because it means there is nothing that anyone could have done to save him. As you can imagine the whole family is devastated - he was the baby of his generation and he and DH were extremely close growing up. I never had the chance to meet him although I have met his parents and grandparents - we had hoped to catch up with him last summer but our trip to Greece was aborted due to my pregnancy.

Poor DH, I've never seen him this upset and it's awful not being able to make it better for him - it's good that he has the baby to focus on but nothing is really going to be able to fix this pain.

On the good things front we're finally making progress on the baby's room and doing that is keeping DH occupied. It's practically empty (just one chest of drawers left in there we don't have any room for anywhere else) and painting has begun. Carpet is being fitted friday afternoon so all other decorating has to be done by then but we are currently on schedule to be done so I'm not too worried. Yet. I am relying on DH getting his finger out when I'm not there to nag though (he's home doing child care for half term whilst I'm at work cos I have no holiday left).


stitcheranon said...

What a nut...he is def. unhinged...Lots of people struggle with infertility..they do not take it out on the rest of the human race. Please be careful and do not take even the slightest risk with this man.
Get walked to and from your car.
Hugs to dh...how sad.


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